For years now I've been told I should write about my dating stories. I've hesitated for various reasons but today is the day I share my most recent dating experience. Let me say in no way am I ever trying to make fun of anyone, I've just been told I need to share my dating stories because my friends think they're highly entertaining. :) I actually haven't dated in a while so recently I refreshed my Tinder profile uploading of course the most recent and advantageous photos.
I matched with an inquisitive looking artist, a type I typically don't date. I figured he'd be interesting and I'd be trying something new, hey you never know! We agreed to meet for a drink at an Italian place downtown after work at 5pm. It was somewhat of a last minute arrangement so I wasn't wearing the cutest outfit. I felt a little frumpy and in my last choice of work clothes, but hey, this is the real me, right? If he can't handle me at my worst he doesn't deserve me at my best, is that how that saying goes? Okkurrrrt!
He's on time and we grab a seat in their heated covered patio in the back of the restaurant. We each order a glass of red wine and talk about how long we've been in New York, where we're from and how life is. We actually touch on past relationships and how important communication is. WOW, how refreshing this is, I'm thinking. So nice to feel depth so early! There happens to be a jazz bar downstairs so we agree to check out the show and have another glass of wine.
It's somewhat of a small jazz bar, potentially only sitting 30 people, very dark and intimate. We're sitting side by side with our backs up against a brick wall in high chairs behind a row of high top tables. There are folks to our left, right, and front, also including the jazz band 15 feet away. As first dates sometimes are, awkward, we're sitting close, hands on each others legs swaying back in forth to the music. We actually got in trouble for talking once so we're really just sitting there feeling the vibes. He was an attractive man and a very talented artist so I must say I was into the moment. We ended up sharing a kiss or two while we enjoyed the music.
About halfway through the show he reaches over and puts his arm around me, OK, all good. But soon I feel his fingers start to reach down past my shoulder, down my arm and toward my rib, but then to my side boob! What! I think I've known him an hour by this point! OK, I can jolt (looking back I should have), but I politely moved my arm back to push his fingers away. But oh, do you think that was his only attempt, of course not! After a few more unsuccessful attempts he brought his arm back up over my shoulder but coincidentally his fingers were dangling close to the opening of my shirt collar so guess where his hands start to go. Yep. DOWN THE FRONT CORNER OF MY BLOUSE. I literally had to smack his hand like a little boy to tell him to stop. I'm boiling by this point. What indicators have I given him to do this? Remember, I'm in my frumpy work clothes, it's only 6:30pm by this point, I mean WHAT THE HELL!
The waiter comes by and asks if we want another drink, I had just told him I wanted to go home because I didn't want to stay out late on a school night. Really I was completely disinterested and wanted to leave. I'm not sure he got my hints because when I asked him which train he was taking home he leans in and says "I think we're going in the same direction" with a smirk. OH, IS THAT RIGHT??
I'm still boiling, but more so sad and disappointed.
We get to the train and I mention I'm going north and he immediately turns and says "OK" and starts walking in that direction. Ummmm. I stopped and looked at him and said, "NO, I AM going this way." He claims he can go this way too and continues to walk with me. I cannot wait to spoil his idea if he thinks he's going home with me. So we're on the train and I ask what stop he's getting off on, and he says "We're really not going to hang out?" I leaned into him and said "I'm 36 years old and completely OK not going home with you tonight, this is our first date, can we not get to know each other some?" He looked surprised.
So yeah, now I'm a bitch. The truth is he has no idea how much of a bitch I can be.
The vibe of course immediately changes and he gets off his stop and says bye in a much more friendly manner. He messages me the following day saying it was great meeting me and it "was cute how I was rubbing his hand." I never responded. A few days later he messages me again saying if he did "anything that made me feel unpleasant" he apologies. Gee, thanks.
So that's it, that's the dating story. The sad part is, I'm actually out here looking for a HUSBAND, a PARTNER. Women of my caliber are looking for someone who is responsible, RESPECTFUL, kind, with manners. Heads up to any man who is trying to take a girl home on the first date don't try with a girl in frumpy work clothes who meets you at 5pm. Thanks!
