I Walked Away From My Career and Got Promoted!

A lot of people's lives are driven by fear, versus desire or chance. It's interesting when you start noticing how many people operate from this crippling intangible.

Last summer I chose to give up my ten-year career in banking to travel the world. My plan was to be gone for two years, or forever, I really had no time frame. Who would have thought I'd come home after only 2 1/2 months. I felt like I needed some sort of structure. Or more of a plan or purpose when setting out on such a grand journey. I also realized I couldn't retire after only working 10 years, who am I kidding!

So nine months after I gave it all up, I'm coming out on top! I've been offered an Assistant Vice President position and substantial salary increase to work for a foreign bank in New York City! If I would have stayed put (and not followed my heart) there is NO way I would have made those accomplishments in nine months. I gave it all up, and got it all back and then some! HELL YEAH!!! GO ME!!!

A lot of people thought I was crazy when I decided to quit my job. I'm sure some doubted me, many questioned me, and it felt like few supported me. But at the end of the day you have to do what YOUR gut tells you, even if (you feel) the odds are stacked against you. It will not be easy, but if you listen and trust your own voice, and your own strength, you will make it!!

If your not willing to risk the unusual you'll have to settle for the ordinary. ;)

If you've been teetering on making a life changing decision - DO IT! The journey will change you, for the better. It will make you stronger. Most fear they may not achieve the outcome they imagine, but what if it ends up better than you imagined!!??

Bad Dates

Wow, this one is hilarious!

A girl knows almost immediately if there will be another date when meeting a guy for the first time. And as this one approached I knew based on his height and weight (being about the same as mine) this would be our only date. Even after these realizations, I was still respectful and followed through the course of the meal carrying basic conversation in hopes that within an hour I could be on my way. This guy was actually nice, so lunch was good for the most part, or maybe it was the amazing fish tacos.

When we finished we parted ways and I thought all was good (and I was free) until I got the following text message…

I mean, WHAT THE HELL!?!?!?  Ugh. Gross. I just can't believe a man would say such a thing to a woman like this after a first date!!  Even after a third date, that is so ridiculous!  

People are crazy and dating is crazy in 2015!  More wine please!!!!

"Quote Boxes"

I love these! I call them "quote boxes." LOL 

Feel free to use, post, or add to your Instagram! Enjoy!

Nature & Dog Walks

The weather this week has been so beautiful! I'm so lucky to have the ability to walk my Mom's dog, Stallone. He is such a sweet being! Having a dog is so awesome, it's such a a great reason to get out and exercise!

Getting outside is good for the soul. Actually being in nature in general is good for the soul. I read an article recently that said being out in nature, and just touching a tree can bring many health benefits. You know the term "tree huggers" exists for a reason. ;)

It works. It really does. Getting out in nature is so easy. All you have to do is go outside and sit on your front porch, actually sit in the grass! Go for a walk. Sit on the sidewalk and strum your fingers through the grass. Who cares if anyone is watching! Every time I walk Stallone I make a point to feel and hug trees and put my fingers on as much nature as I can. 

I just had the most wonderful day outside this week, I got some exercise and I got a little tan! GO NATURE!

When is the last time you've hugged a tree?

Bad Dates

I love confidence, but there's a fine line between being confident and being arrogant and obviously trying to make up for something. Too much confidence is unattractive, in my opinion. Too many of those one-liners, especially, make me want to vomit.

"By the way I think you have prolific beauty."

This guy's game almost had me. In our first phone conversation he asked me if anyone had told me I was beautiful today? I looked around the room shocked because I really couldn't believe what I was hearing, WOW! I chuckled and said "NO," and he said "Well let me be the first one to tell you...."

How sweet was that! Another day he sent me a text saying "Enjoy your message." I had actually missed his phone call and he left me a voicemail telling me I was beautiful. Awwww how sweet.

Now here's where I have an issue when first meeting someone. I don't want to go from zero to 100 after we exchange a few texts and talk on the phone one time. I get it you can be into someone, but starting to text them all day every day after your first phone call is a little much. I don't want to feel obligated to text and respond to you ASAP every single day after first speaking with you. SORRY BOO.  Can we please space this out some!

So this guy is texting me every day, sometimes multiple times a day. Geez man. One day I didn't respond as quickly as he would have liked, so in a matter of hours he responds with: "Or not, stay wild traveler." 

Jesus Christ. Stage 5 Clinger Alert!!

Ok maybe I'm being too judgemental, maybe he was genuinely interested in this woman of prolific beauty he had just chatted with. At this point I was still OK with taking him up on the offer of a lunch date. Cautiously.

So we meet for lunch. I had not planned on drinking, but once we realized we both had a love for whisky, his pushing for drinks led to one, then two, and three rounds. I mean we both had no where to be, so sure! We actually talked about a lot of different things. But there just comes a point where you just know you aren't jiving with the person. I realized this earlier than I thought with this one. The sleazy one liners, hand rubbing, and slanted eye looks like he was filming a sexy cowboy video shoot while we were eating were just too much. BARF NOW. UGH. Whatever, I held it together and grubbed down on extra chips to soak up all the Jack. Lunch came to an end and we politely departed in our own directions.

Now I'm not trying to bash the guy, because some of this game tactics were on point, but this one thing he did set me over the top.

So not only did he immediately text me right after lunch, but also that night and next day. WOAH MAN. At this point I may be purposely trying to create a little bit of time between our conversations. Well he obviously didn't like that because he came to me with this: "Don't tell me you're a flake out after I spent $89 at Cabo Fish Taco LOL."  Man I had to get real with him. Maybe he should consider coffee for a first date rather than a whisky infused lunch when you are meeting a girl for the first time. Jesus.

That was the nail in the coffin for me, amongst other things. Stage 5 Clingers - I'm not interested.

I think he's gotten the hint now after I haven't responded to numerous texts. Sorry buddy.


I'm still hopeful for love though, and that will never change. <3

Dating or Love?

Not often do I allow someone else's words to speak for mine, but this piece sums up my thoughts and feelings SO well on dating these days; I had to imprint every single one of Jamie Varon's words on my blog. Any guy that wants to date me, read every single word below. And put your damn phone and hash tags to rest, Jesus. Social media validation seems more important these days than actual in person experience and validation. Not my preference or my style!

This Is How We Date Now

Jamie Varon

We don’t commit now. We don’t see the point. They’ve always said there are so many fish in the sea, but never before has that sea of fish been right at our fingertips on OkCupid, Tinder, Grindr, Dattch, take your pick. We can order up a human being in the same way we can order up pad thai on Seamless. We think intimacy lies in a perfectly-executed string of emoji. We think effort is a “good morning” text. We say romance is dead, because maybe it is, but maybe we just need to reinvent it. Maybe romance in our modern age is putting the phone down long enough to look in each other’s eyes at dinner. Maybe romance is deleting Tinder off your phone after an incredible first date with someone. Maybe romance is still there, we just don’t know what it looks like now.

When we choose—if we commit—we are still one eye wandering at the options. We want the beautiful cut of filet mignon, but we’re too busy eyeing the mediocre buffet, because choice. Because choice. Our choices are killing us. We think choice means something. We think opportunity is good. We think the more chances we have, the better. But, it makes everything watered-down. Never mind actually feeling satisfied, we don’t even understand what satisfaction looks like, sounds like, feels like. We’re one foot out the door, because outside that door is more, more, more. We don’t see who’s right in front of our eyes asking to be loved, because no one is asking to be loved. We long for something that we still want to believe exists. Yet, we are looking for the next thrill, the next jolt of excitement, the next instant gratification.

We soothe ourselves and distract ourselves and, if we can’t even face the demons inside our own brain, how can we be expected to stick something out, to love someone even when it’s not easy to love them? We bail. We leave. We see a limitless world in a way that no generation before us has seen. We can open up a new tab, look at pictures of Portugal, pull out a Visa, and book a plane ticket. We don’t do this, but we can. The point is that we know we can, even if we don’t have the resources to do so. There are always other tantalizing options. Open up Instagram and see the lives of others, the life we could have. See the places we’re not traveling to. See the lives we’re not living. See the people we’re not dating. We bombard ourselves with stimuli, input, input, input, and we wonder why we’re miserable. We wonder why we’re dissatisfied. We wonder why nothing lasts and everything feels a little hopeless. Because, we have no idea how to see our lives for what they are, instead of what they aren’t.

And, even if we find it. Say we find that person we love who loves us. Commitment. Intimacy. “I love you.” We do it. We find it. Then, quickly, we live it for others. We tell people we’re in a relationship on Facebook. We throw our pictures up on Instagram. We become a “we.” We make it seem shiny and perfect because what we choose to share is the highlight reel. We don’t share the 3am fights, the reddened eyes, the tear-stained bedsheets. We don’t write status updates about how their love for us shines a light on where we don’t love ourselves. We don’t tweet 140 characters of sadness when we’re having the kinds of conversations that can make or break the future of our love. This is not what we share. Shiny picture. Happy couple. Love is perfect.

Then, we see these other happy, shiny couples and we compare. We are The Emoji Generation. Choice Culture. The Comparison Generation. Measuring up. Good enough. The best. Never before have we had such an incredible cornucopia of markers for what it looks like to live the Best Life Possible. We input, input, input and soon find ourselves in despair. We’ll never be good enough, because what we’re trying to measure up to just does not fucking exist. These lives do not exist. These relationships do not exist. Yet, we can’t believe it. We see it with our own eyes. And, we want it. And, we will make ourselves miserable until we get it.

So, we break up. We break up because we’re not good enough, our lives aren’t good enough, our relationship isn’t good enough. We swipe, swipe, swipe, just a bit more on Tinder. We order someone up to our door just like a pizza. And, the cycle starts again. Emoji. “Good morning” text. Intimacy. Put down the phone. Couple selfie. Shiny, happy couple. Compare. Compare. Compare. The inevitable creeping in of latent, subtle dissatisfaction. The fights. “Something is wrong, but I don’t know what it is.” “This isn’t working.” “I need something more.” And, we break up. Another love lost. Another graveyard of shiny, happy couple selfies.

On to the next. Searching for the elusive more. The next fix. The next gratification. The next quick hit. Living our lives in 140 characters, 5 second snaps, frozen filtered images, four minute movies, attention here, attention there. More as an illusion. We worry about settling, all the while making ourselves suffer thinking that anything less than the shiny, happy filtered life we’ve been accustomed to is settling. What is settling? We don’t know, but we fucking don’t want it. If it’s not perfect, it’s settling. If it’s not glittery filtered love, settling. If it’s not Pinterest-worthy, settling.

We realize that this more we want is a lie. We want phone calls. We want to see a face we love absent of the blue dim of a phone screen. We want slowness. We want simplicity. We want a life that does not need the validation of likes, favorites, comments, upvotes. We may not know yet that we want this, but we do. We want connection, true connection. We want a love that builds, not a love that gets discarded for the next hit. We want to come home to people. We want to lay down our heads at the end of our lives and know we lived well, we lived the fuck out of our lives. This is what we want even if we don’t know it yet.

Yet, this is not how we date now. This is not how we love now.

Flashback Friday

Today I've been reflecting on a lot of things, and I stumbled upon a lot of old pictures from my travels over the past few years. It's nice to reflect every now and then to understand where you've been and where you're going.  I'm extremely grateful for these experiences.

I wanted to share some of my favorite travel photos. Feel free to follow the links to find additional details on my travels in these special places.

This photo was taken walking around Lisbon, Portugal.

This photo was taken from the office of my previous employer in New York City. 

This was one of my first days in Bora Bora, French Polynesia.  I was extremely excited to get in this magical water. I brought that inner tube from home and the resort had flippers and masks for us to use. I was ready to go!  

This picture was taken in Thailand at the Tiger Temple. I was actually walking a tiger! You are looking at me trying my hardest to be invisible in this moment. The tiger had stopped to pee and was barely looking back watching me. The range of emotions I was feeling in this exact moment are indescribable.

Here I am walking up the stairs inside the Duomo in Florence, Italy.  Florence was one of my favorite places I visited in Europe.

I'd taken a trolley up the mountain to this high viewpoint in Interlaken, Switzerland. 

This picture was taken on a boat tour of the islands off Thailand. These magical waters are my second favorite in the world after Bora Bora.